Monday 09:16 - Jack and Doug arrive at Chateau Blyth approximately 17 minutes late. It wouldn’t have been the start Jack wanted but it was the latest we were for anything all trip.

09:19 - Doug questions Ben’s parentage and sexuality for the first time.

19:30 (46 seconds ahead of schedule) - Formula 1 hotel near Dijon welcome the famous European cyclists for their stopover. An all you can eat Chinese is wolfed down before we retire for the evening to sleep (Ben and Doug) or complete 4000 press ups throughout the night (Jack).

Tuesday 14:30 (86 minutes ahead of schedule) - Arrival at Chalet Beyond. Small talk (in Dutch) is completed and in pouring rain we headed down the 9km (8% average) descent (which would be the climb at the end of each ride we did) before turning left and riding the 10km to the base of Alp D’Huez.

16:13 - The base of the Dutch mountain. Once Jack and Doug had ensured I couldn’t get lost on the climb we set off, speedometers set to zero and targets in mind.  The start of the climb was a killer but after the first two turns it settled down to an ‘easier’ 8%-9% which allowed a little rhythm. 

Unsure if the cold and rain helped we all charged up the climb and finished with very respectable times of 56:04 (Ben), 1:01:00 (Jack) and 1:04:00 (Doug).  After two days travelling and the weather we were all well pleased with the effort before heading off home for our tea… just that bloody climb up to the chalet.

Wednesday 07:44:58 (2 seconds ahead of schedule) Jack roused Doug and Ben with a sharp rap on the door to ensure we are aware breakfast is ready and confirm “You are not having sex are you?”

10:31 After a quick trip to Bourg D’Orsains we head out for a 70 mile route taking in the climbs of Col de la Morte which was a stunning, wooded climb which went on and on at around 9% before eventually opening up at the top and allowing us our lunch stop. A beautiful, but cold descent took us down in to the valley and also in to the sun for the first time on the trip.  The quiet roads, which contained more cyclists than cars, quickly took us to the base of the second climb of the day, the Col de Ornon. This was tougher than the first climb and the hot weather was a challenge seeing how well wrapped up we were from the morning rain.  After cresting the top we wasted no time in hurtling down the long descent, Doug as usual leading the way passing cars as he went.

16:40 (on time) we arrived home, tired but still with time for a masterclass in bike cleaning from Doug.

Thursday - Today was a day off the bike. After a stunning drive part way up the Col de Lautaret we then walked up the remaining five miles to take our place part way up the Galibier. All in all it was an excellent day with fine weather, stunning scenery Didi the devil and Doug pacing Andy Schleck amongst others up the climb.

Friday - One of the best days both on and off the bike you could have. Back over to Alp D’Huez, we spent a couple of hours pottering up and down the climb which was out of this world. Riding through Dutch corner behind a Rabobank car with thousands of Dutchmen and women going wild is something I will never forget.  After managing to watch most of the days stage on various TV’s Doug and Jack then managed to find an excellent vantage point to watch the stars go past. Unforgettable.

Saturday - 00:00:01 - It starts raining.

09:01:04 (3 seconds early) - We set off to tackle the first of the days climbs in very wet and cold weather, quite a change from the previous two and a half days. The Croix de Fer was an astounding climb but, like all climbs over there, just went on and on, passing a couple of riders on the way up from Hartshead we eventually reached the top feeling very cold (well, I did, Jack, as usual seemed at whatever temparature he set his own thermostat at that morning). After being convinced to continue by the other two we headed off for the descent. Jack and Doug descended like Pro’s (no, not prostitutes), I descended like a 12 year old girl, actually, no, I was worse than that, I descended like Andy Schleck down to the lunch stop.

After a little food and warming up slightly we decided (after I had finished crying) that we would be foolish to climb the Galibier as planned due to the chance/likelyhood of snow at the top and instead took the easy route home. Just a quick hop over the Col de Glandon.  After 12 miles of climbing at 10% and seeing the road rising up in to the clouds we did wonder if we were seeing things. Unfortunately, due to a puncture Jack ended off out ahead and Doug and I brought up the rear (shut it Wareham).  This was far and away the hardest climb I, if not any of us, had ever done and I am amazed it isn’t used more in the big races.  Eventually at the top, you come out a kilometer from the top of the Croix de Fer so at least we knew the descent.  The 2 hour climb that morning took us 20 minutes on the way down.

Sunday - Jack, the machine, got us home after leaving at 08:30 by 21:30.

An unforgettable trip, mixed conditions, amazing scenery and superb company. There is far to much to remember but for next years trip, get training as those climbs are not easy.

P.s - Two dogs - What was it you said? “34-25 won’t get you over the Alps…”?